My way is the best! And I won’t change
From a place of LOVE
Certain things do not have to be said. We want to help someone we love by pointing out how they can turn their lives around by shifting their reaction to specific situations, how they care for their personal hygiene, work habits, and more.
Yet, we might see resistance to listening to our opinion, even thou it comes from the heart. Come to a point where our beloved ones don’t even want to listen to you overall, and both set to accepting”each other’s difference, even thou it means compromising your happiness.
It can be frustrating to deal with someone too proud and stubborn to accept the input of someone who genuinely cares and loves them.
Why won’t they change?
The main problem lies in these proud and stuck-up people who can take criticism well. They have difficulty seeing their own flaws, believing that their way is the best, the only best way.
It might be a way of protecting themselves, trying to have some control of their lives, standing on their grounds, and leaving a comfort zone. It can be the most challenging thing for some people.
Are they bad for not wanting to change? Definitely, they are not bad, but for sure, they are crazy, in my opinion.
My personal opinion
Even thou my opinion is not relevant to most of the world, I guess still valuable and worth to be shared with my readers.
By being a woman with lots of energy and personality, I have encountered various challenges in my life. However, I can say that most people in my life.
Men and women were influential in their convictions to such elevate level that even while facing difficulties of any kind, they would refuse to make specific shifts in their lives.
And that frustrated me so much, not because I wanted them to act in a certain way, but because it deeply hurt me to see them slowing their progress and personal growth because of their need to prove that they are better than anybody else.
Being a clairvoyant empathetic person, the amount of suffering and pain that I can get from engaging with very committed people to self-sabotage and harm are humongous.
I am sure that some of you can get what I am saying!
We all have someone who feels frustrated because they won’t listen!
For you, my frustrated, tired reader, all I can say is that what has worked for me is:
Keep your opinions and advice to yourself
- Don’t try to help those who do not want to be helped
- It’s not about you
- Shield yourself
- Walk away if you can!
In my life right now, these FIVE tips I gave you below are how I conduct my life.
Usually, I say that I live in a bubble that I visualize and imagine to be surrounding me, protecting me from the negativity and defensive mechanisms tactics that the people I love and want to support users to “put me in my place.”
I learned to identify with certain tenacity and speed when someone I care about and who claims to care about me is not open to changing themselves. And with even more speed, how can I remove myself from their presence.
But isn’t it a bit too much?
Not in my opinion.
My personal decision regarding the resistance to change people
That is because staying with people who have no desire to shift their narcissistic behavior and/or negative patterns can jeopardize all I have worked for in the past several years.
My priority is to be a bit selfish regarding my mental health and happiness.
Happiness is my goal, every time, every way. Disregard what the uncontrolled external circumstances or my internal negative paradigm try to make me believe.
When people say that it is lonely at the top, I agree and disagree. I agree because I can’t reach my priorities or protect myself if I keep all the negative Nancy inside my safe bubble.
Then I disagree because once we shield ourselves, we will meet the right people, peers with the same mindset, that will understand and support our decisions. Because they also have done the necessary shifts to become better and grow as humans.
When will they change?
That is a tricky question to be answered.
But I can quote the words of Tony Robbins by saying, ” Change happens when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change,” and I have seen it several times.
Change happens when pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change.
Regardless of what we think and say, anyone won’t change! No matter how many times we tell them or show them how better their life can become if they do it.
And I won’t stop saying it because I want you to understand that you gotta be smarter and let it go.
I am not saying that letting go of your beloved ones, your husband, or your kids, but let go of this need of giving them advice and helping them emotionally and psychologically.
It will only bring you pain and suffering for something you are not responsible for.
There will become a point where they will change for better or worse, but it will only happen when they decide to do it because they see that it becomes too dangerous or damaging to remain the same.
Rewarding changing motivation
People also change because they focus on the “rewards” that those changes can bring to their lives and the people around them.
Have you ever heard of a bad boy becoming so sweet and kind to others that you can’t recognize them?
It could be that bad boys have learned that they can have better friends, their parents are calmer, and people actually enjoy being around them when he is kind and respectful to others.
Protect yourself from unnecessary extra stress, and lead by kindness, compassion, and self-control.
And pray that your beloved ones figure out what are the necessary shifts they have to make to live a fluid, positive, happy life without the need of feeling any pain or suffering.
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